Dimension Reality Twist
by Mego ZT
Summary: Dr. Drakken and Shego end up in the real world after escaping the Jabbermittens. What happens when they get stuck there and someone from the real world gets trapped in the KP universe? Takes place after Dimension Twist. Cowritten with Teh Dipstick.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter I**

"Made it with some time to spare," nineteen year old redhead Nathan Thompson says, dropping into his recliner. Grabbing the remote, he turns the TV on to watch Kim Possible. He reaches for his pack of cigarettes, only to remember he smoked the last one on his way home from work. "Dang it!" he yells. "I was in such a rush to get home in time to see the new episode it slipped my mind." He looks at his watch and realizes he has fifteen minutes before the show starts. After a few seconds of his eyes darting back and forth between the TV and his watch, he decides to chance it. It usually only takes about ten minutes by foot because the gas station is only a couple of blocks away. "I'll drive anyway just to be on the safe side," he says aloud, grabbing his keys and running out the door.

Eight minutes later, Nathan is about to climb back in his car and drive back to his apartment when he feels a tap on his shoulder and hears a middle aged woman ask, "Excuse me, sir? My car has been acting up lately and now it won't start at all. Could you give me a jump, please? I've got cables."

"Yeah, sure," he says without giving it a second thought. He knows he can just watch it another time, but this lady needs help now.

"Shego, get him off!" Dr. Drakken yells at his assistant. "How can something so soft be so heavy?"

"Hey, when you have hair down to your butt you'll understand. Besides, my arms are pinned down so I can't really…"

The immense weight is lifted off of the two villains as Mr. Sitdown suddenly stands up and walks away, leaving them free to move. Drakken brushes himself off as they stand up, groaning at his current appearance. "How did I ever let those Evil Eye fellows talk me into this?"

"Finally figured out you look like an idiot?" Shego responds, getting up herself and folding her arms. "Now where's your little portal thingy to get us home?"

"Dimensional compiler, Shego," Drakken corrects her.

"Like I said, portal thingy," the woman continues, knowing just how her uncaring nature needles her employer.

"Yes, whatever," he hisses as he picks the compiler up off of the ground. "Now let's get out of here before you find another way for these felt creatures to punish us." Drakken presses a few buttons and the cumbersomely large gadget opens a portal. "This is it. Our exit."

"Yeah, yeah. It better be, for your sake." Shego grabs Drakken's wrist and steps into the wormhole, pulling him and his device in after her. "Wrong again, Doc," she says, turning to face him. They're in a dark, unfamiliar apartment. The only light is emitting from the television screen. "I don't know where we are but it sure isn't…"

"Isn't what?" the mad scientist asks.

"You're not feeling all good, nice and chirpy, are ya?"

Drakken scowls back at her before speaking. "What are you talking about, Shego?"

"Well, that answers my question. Anyway, your skin. You're not blue."

"Say what? Quick, a light switch!"

Shego searches the room high and low for a whole minute in the dark before finding wheat she's looking for. As the lights turn on she once again turns back to face her boss. "See what I mean?"

Drakken isn't paying attention. He's too busy looking at his own hands, holding them up in front of him like he's never seen them before. He isn't feeling like he wants to cure world hunger or knit a woolen sweater. In fact, he still really only wants world domination. He's not good, so what's with the loss of skin color? As he keeps staring at his own fingers he notices something through them. His assistant's skin is as normal as his is. "It's happened to you as well."

The villainess doesn't say anything. She just looks at him before walking off towards the closest door.

"What are you looking for?"

"A bathroom."

"Shego, this isn't the time to be thinking about…"

"Mirror, Dr. D."

"Oh right."

After trying a couple of doors Shego finally finds the bathroom. While she's practically gawking at herself in the mirror, almost overwhelmed by this new change in her appearance, Drakken's going over their current situation in his head. Alright, so they aren't home just yet and their skin has changed colors. His priority however is neither problem right now. "There's obviously something wrong with the dimensional compiler. It's taken a beating after all." He decides the first order of business is to repair the broken apparatus, before worrying about what might've happened to them and, last but not least, going home.

"Are you quite finished looking at yourself?" he asks his sidekick, having walked up to the bathroom door.

Shego turns and frowns at him, noticing the dimensional compiler in his hands. "Yeah, I'm done."

"Good, because I need you to help me look for tools so I can fix this thing."

"Fine." She rolls her eyes as she follows him back into the living room.

Drakken places the compiler on top of the television the two of them apparently emerged from. "Alright," he says. "Let's spread out and find whoever lives here's toolbox. It's got to be somewhere."

Shego moves towards a doorway she checked before, when looking for the bathroom. "I'll be in the kitchen."

"Oh no you won't. I'm taking the kitchen!" Drakken rushes ahead of her, grinning like a kid on Christmas eve. "I'm the employer after all, and you're the employee."

The green and black clad woman frowns and stomps off in the opposite direction, where she finds herself in the bedroom. "No way I'm gonna find any tools here, but at least I'm not stuck with glutton boy."

In the meantime, Drakken is looking for tools himself, or well, he's feeling a bit peckish so he decides to raid the fridge first. "This will be the ultimate sandwich! Now if only I can find the pickles."

Nathan arrives back at his apartment with ten minutes left in the show. He decides to sit out on the steps and enjoy the cool breeze instead of going in and possibly seeing something that would spoil the episode.

He pulls out a cigarette and lights it, taking a deep drag. His friends and co-workers often made fun of him for hitting the door running just to get home in time to watch Kim Possible. "Haha, you watch a cartoon about high school cheerleader?" they'd laugh. "Are you gay or something?" Nathan never could quite see how watching a female cheerleader save the world counted as evidence of having an alternative sexuality, but then again, he didn't care. These were the same chuckleheads who watched every anime they could get their hands on. In his mind, they were the pot and he was the kettle.

He puts his cigarette butt in the ash can and heads upstairs to his small apartment. Opening the door, he steps inside and hangs his keys up. The sound of the theme song being played as the closing credits roll fills the apartment. _Perfect timing,_ he thinks while heading into the living room. _The ending isn't ruined, and I'm just in time to watch what's on next._ Drakken and Shego are hidden from view by the kitchen and bedroom doors respectively even though they aren't trying to hide. They are as unaware of Nathan's presence as he is of their's.

_Wait, why are the lights on? _He looks around the room to see if anyone is there and Drakken's dimensional compiler catches his eye, and he pauses. "What in the world is this thing?" He picks it up off of the television and starts to look it over. On the bottom he sees the words _Property of Dr. Drakken._ "Oh whatever," he says rolling his eyes. Pranks and jokes are natural way of life for Nathan's circle of friends, so he assumes this is just the latest in an ongoing battle. He decides to play along. In his mind, his friends must have put a lot of thought into it and he does enjoy a good prank, even if it is done at his expense. "I'm sure I can come up with something better than this to pay them back," he rationalizes as he flips the machine back over and pulls the lever.

Nothing happens. "This is dumb." He shakes the machine a bit and hears some rattling from inside. "Let's try this again." He resets the lever and pulls it once more. A fluorescent green light arches from the top of it and strikes the cable box on top of the TV. There is a loud whooshing noise as a portal, coming from the television screen, opens up right in front of him. The other side looks like Drakken's lair, and Nathan swears he can see Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable talking on the other side. "Whoa, what kind of video player is _this?_" he wonders as he takes a couple of steps back. All of a sudden he feels himself being sucked in towards the portal. "What the…? " he yells loudly as he his pulled off his feet.

Drakken and Shego come running in from the other rooms. "My dimensional compiler!" Drakken yells. "Shego!"

"Already on it, Doc," Shego says, charging towards him.

"AAAAAHHHH! Help!" Nathan continues to yell.

"Oh you're gonna need it kid," she responds diving at him, but she's a split second too late. Because of Shego's angle of approach, she misses Nathan and flies right by the portal. The pull of the portal screws up her trajectory and she crashes into the entertainment center just as Nathan disappears. The loud crack of the cable box connecting with Shego's ankle is drowned out as the television falls off and crashes onto the floor. The glass doors shatter into hundreds of pieces, sending broken bits of glass everywhere.

"NO!" Drakken growls. "Do you realize how badly you've goofed, Shego?"

"Less than you would've?" Shego retorts, standing back up.

"That was my lair on the other side!" He rants, waving his small hands in the air. "We could have been home free if you hadn't broken the TV!"

"Yeah, and I wouldn't have glass in my leg, either," she snaps back, limping towards him.

"Yes, you wouldn't have… Wait, what?" Drakken suddenly becomes concerned as he realizes what she had said.

"Look, Doc," she tells him, pointing her right leg. The fabric is torn, and blood is trickling down her leg from several cuts.

"Oh snap, Shego! You're hurt."

"Gee, ya think?" she says, rolling her eyes.

Back in Drakken's lair, Kim is talking with Wade to set up a ride home for her and Ron when the portal opens up. Nathan is still screaming when he is deposited five feet above the ground. He lands directly on his rear-end. On his way down, he drops the device and it smashes to the floor, several pieces scattering around him. One piece, however, rolls under one of Drakken's numerous death rays.

Nathan looks up to see a confused and astonished Kim and Ron looking at him. "Uh, Wade, we might need a ride for three people. I'll get back to you on that."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter II**

Nathan sits up and rubs the back of head where it smacked hard off of the floor as Kim and Ron approach him. "Are you okay?" Kim asks, crouching down.

"Be careful, Kim," Ron warns. "He could be working for Drakken."

"I doubt that, Ron. He's not wearing the usual red henchman getup that Dr. Drakken's minions do."

Nathan looks up towards the voices. "Man, I must have hit my head harder than I thought," he mutters, as he realizes who they are.

"Well, you did hit the ground pretty hard," Kim says to him.

"I'm aware," he responds tersely. "The giant lump on the back of my head and the incessant pounding prove that."

Kim turns towards Ron and says, "I wonder what TV show he's from."

"Not a happy one, I'm guessing," Ron answers casually. "He seems… I dunno, moopy."

"I'm not from a TV show," Nathan states. "You are. You two are the cartoon characters, not me."

"No, Scratchy and Bitey are cartoon characters," Ron explains. Rufus, who is standing on Ron's shoulder, nods in agreement and echoes Ron.

"We're real people, I can assure you," Kim says, backing Ron up.

"Then I am really dreaming," Nathan replies, standing up and brushing himself off. "There's no way I got sucked into a TV show."

"You're not dreaming," she tells him, starting to get annoyed. "You must have hit your head pretty hard if you think this isn't real."

"Getting sucked into the TV doesn't exactly happen, you know," Ron says.

"Ron! What do you think just happened to us?"

"I know we just did, Kim, but if he's here with us, how could he be stuck inside the television?"

"Wait, what are you two talking about?" Nathan interrupts.

"Well," Ron begins. "My dad had just gotten cable. You see, he thought it was a fad. I was watching a Scamper and Bitey marathon, and I lost track of time and forgot to meet KP at Bueno Nacho so she came and…"

"Hey," Nathan interrupts. "A little less detail if you would, please?"

"I'll explain it to him," Kim says gesturing towards Ron. "Drakken and Shego had just stolen the Pan Dimensional Vortex Inducer _again_, so Ron and I went to go get it back from them _again_." Kim spends the next several minutes explaining their adventure of literally channel surfing. "So, I guess people can come out of the television as well as go into it," she finishes.

"Now I understand what's going on here," Nathan says. "Since I missed tonight's episode, my subconscious is taking the bits and pieces I saw from the commercial and..."

"Nngh!" Kim growls in frustration, interrupting him. "I can prove this isn't a dream of your's."

"I'd love to see you do that," Nathan replies, quite certain she can't. In response, Kim kicks him right in the shin. "OW!" he yells in pain, grabbing his leg. "What was _that_ for?"

"They say you can't feel pain in a dream, and since you're feeling pain, then you must not be dreaming."

"You raise an interesting argument, but couldn't you have just reminded me of my headache instead of kicking me in the leg?"

"You're lucky I kicked you in the _leg_," Kim states with her hands on her hips. Nathan narrows his eyes at her as he gets her meaning.

"You know, KP, he's gotcha there," Ron says. "No need to put the man in more pain than he already is."

"You're right," she sighs. "I apologize."

"I've never really put much stock into that theory, anyway," Nathan tells them. "But before you decide to put me in more pain and because we're merely arguing in circles, I'll go ahead and agree with you. Besides, I've always wondered what it would be like living here. Granted, this isn't real, but it beats the dreams I usually have."

"Don't you want to go back to your own world?" Ron asks him.

Nathan shakes his head. "Nah. I spend about sixteen hours a day in the real world. I kind of enjoy sleeping, and I'm sure I'll wake up soon enough. No need to rush it."

Kim stamps her foot, getting fed up with him constantly insinuating she's some fictional character. "For the last time, this is _not_ a dream!"

"If you say so," he responds, pulling his pack of cigarettes out of his inside jacket pocket. He removes one and sticks it in his mouth.

Ron raises an eyebrow. "What is that, KP?"

"I have no idea, Ron," Kim answers, giving Nathan a queer look.

"That's not some kind of explosive device is it?" Ron asks when Nathan lights the end of it.

"What? No," Nathan replies. "Don't be stupid. If this were some mini-bomb, my mouth is the last place I'd put it."

"Then what is it?"

"It's a cigarette," Nathan says slowly, surprised that they need to ask.

"A ciga-whatsit?" Kim and Ron ask, both getting more and more confused.

"A cigarette. You know, a fag, a smoke, a nicotine stick?" They both continue to stare blankly at him. "You can't tell me these things don't exist here." Kim and Ron shake their head no. "I guess you're right," Nathan says, taking a puff. "This isn't a dream. It's a nightmare."

Just then, the kimmunicator goes off. "What's the sitch, Wade?" Kim answers it.

"Just letting you know your ride is on the way. Still need room for three?"

"Affirmative, Wade," Kim answers him, smiling. "Please get a hold of Global Justice and tell them I will be swinging by tomorrow. I've got a dimensional compiler they might want to look at."

"That invention of Drakken's? It seems pretty unstable, but the idea of dimensional travel is something pretty new, so I'm sure they'll want to look at it. I wouldn't mind a peek myself, if it's not too much trouble. By the way, Kim, who is coming back with you?"

Kim looks over and sees the two guys arm wrestling on a table with Rufus running around their elbows to make sure both are playing fair. "Just a new friend Ron made tonight," Kim replies dryly. "Oh, I hear the sound of a chopper outside. See ya in the morning, Wade."

"Later, Kim," Wade responds as the Kimmunicator shuts off. "Okay boys, it's time to clock out and head home," Kim informs them, as she heads up the stairs leading to the roof.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter III**

"OW! Jeeze Doc, are ya trying to help me or make it worse?" Shego complains, as she sits in a chair opposite her employer with her leg in his lap.

"This isn't easy, Shego! It's very delicate work, which means I need you to be quiet so I can concentrate on what I'm doing!" Drakken responds, pulling another shard of glass out of her leg with a pair of tweezers.

"Blah blah whatever blah. Just, less talking and more… OW!"

Drakken smirks a little as his sidekick yelps in pain, thinking she deserves it for being sassy even when he's trying to help. "There, that's the last one. I don't think you need any sutures. The cuts aren't that deep, but I am going to find some bandages for you to put on. And something to clean the wounds with."

"What about my ankle?" Shego asks with a hint of worry in her voice.

"I'm not a doctor…"

"Not a real one anyway."

"Shush! I would so have a doctorate in computer science if I hadn't left college you know!"

"Which you did."

"Nnnnnghhnnnn…I'M NOT A MEDICAL DOCTOR!" He yells before sighing. "But from what I can see it's not broken, just badly sprained. It'll be fine in few days. You just need to take it easy in the meantime."

"Me? Take things easy? Dr. D, did you hit your head when we came out of the TV or something? You know I don't do the whole lying in bed thing." the woman reminds her boss.

"Well doodles for you then, because I don't intend to waste precious time constructing a brace." he answers.

"You don't know how to make one, do you?" Shego guesses.

"That's not important!"

"Ya know, as a doctor you should be making me feel like I'm in good..."

"SHEGO!"

A little while later Shego's lying on the couch with her injured leg resting on the armrest, keeping it held high to keep the swelling down. Having pretty much nothing to do, no nail file or magazines to read in, she's bored stiff. Annoying Dr. D would probably be fun but he's in the bedroom looking for something new to wear and she doesn't really feel like getting up. Not when she only has one good leg to hover on.

"My word, Shego!" she suddenly hears from the bedroom. "The boy's some sort of hippy or something."

"Is there anything you won't complain about?" she shouts back, rolling her eyes.

"There are denim shorts in here Shego!" he replies loudly.

"Doc, since when do hippies wear denim shorts?"

"Since… Since… Since I'm ignoring you now!"

"Awww, you are?" she asks in a sweet yet sarcastic tone.

"Yes I… Why is there a pink tie?" Drakken continues, already forgetting what he just told her.

"What?"

"He has a pink tie!"

"Yes, and?" Shego asks, wondering what her boss is able to find wrong with it.

"I can't wear pink!" he retorts. "Why would he have a pink tie?"

The villainess quietly sighs to herself, wondering what it'd be like to work for a sane person. "I'm sure he only bought it and put it there because he knew you'd drop by and he wanted to 'vex' you."

"That's highly unlikely." Drakken replies, not picking up on the sarcasm.

"Dr. D.?"

"Yes?"

"I have to tell ya, you're lucky you have your good looks to fall back on."

"Oh zip it!"

Shego smiles to herself, knowing she's able to irritate the man without even being in the same room. He may not be the best boss but he sure is entertaining. More so when she could actually see him though. "Ya done in there soon, or what?" she inquires.

"Just a second, Shego. I think I've found something wearable. Oh it's going to be nice getting out of this ridiculous getup. You won't believe how much it chafes."

"No, you won't believe how much you just made me wanna hurl."

Drakken groans as he leaves the bedroom, stepping out in front of the couch. "Well? What do you think?"

"Hmmm. Red polo shirt. Blue khaki pants. I don't know…" Shego answers before noticing something. "Doc?" she asks.

"Yes?"

"Are those socks?"

"Yes." he tells her, wondering where she's going with this. "And?"

"With leather sandals?"

"Yes…"  
"No!" she tells him in a firm voice.

"What?"

"No what. Just no."

"Shego, I'm not following." the madman tells his sidekick.

"You can't wear socks with sandals."

"What? Why not? Since when?"

"It's one of the basic rules of fashion, Dr. D. Like how black looks good with everything." Shego explains.

"Fine. Is there anything else wrong with how I've dressed myself?" Drakken asks, sounding a little more annoyed than usual.

"Just that it looks like you've been shopping in the kiddie-aisle."

"So the shirt's a little tight. He's obviously smaller than me."

"A little?" Shego laughs. "Doc, you're still sporting a bare midriff."

"Ugh…" the evil genius groans.

A couple of hours later Drakken is helping Shego settling down at the kitchen table. He's made something to eat for the both of them. Working with what he could find he's managed to whip up a nice pasta dinner with a salad and some bread on the side. Shego grabs her fork and spoon and slowly starts picking at the food. Drakken looks up from his already half empty plate, swallowing down his latest mouthful. "Well are you going to eat or not?" he asks. "It's not poison."

"As much as I hate to admit it Doc, I know you're an adequate cook."

"Well why aren't you eating then? You're the one who told me you were hungry. Unless there are other Shegos around."

"Dr. D," she sighs. "Sarcasm. Yeah, not your thing."

"But I'm getting better at it, right?"

"Sure ya are."

"I knew it!" the madman grins.

"Doy! Now that, that was good, no great sarcasm!" Shego tries to explain.

"Back on topic!" Drakken growls, losing his patience.

"Yeah, alright! Don't get all whiney at me because you're not good at something." his assistant tells him. "I'm not eating because I've got a lotta things on my mind right now."

"Like?"

"Like I'm wondering why everything looks so dark and gritty, and has this… depth to it. And why our proportions are all outta whack."

"We're in another dimension. Of course some things are going to be different."

"It's just weird is all. I mean, nothing around here has any distinct outlines or anything."

"Other dimension, Shego!" Drakken hisses, sure she didn't hear him the first time.

"Relax, will ya? See this is why I don't share thoughts with you," she replies. "You get all antsy over nothing!"

"I… I just want you to eat." the mad scientist sighs at her. "Even healing a wound demands energy."

Shego doesn't answer him, but quietly takes a bite out of the bread and starts working on the spaghetti with her fork and spoon. She knows he's right. She just isn't going to give him the satisfaction of telling him that. Not now, after how he snapped at her when she was only answering his question. This isn't the first time they're eating dinner together by a long shot. No, they live together during the week so it's only natural that they usually have their evening meal together. There's something different this time though. An awkward, uncomfortable silence is hanging overhead, probably brought on by her injury and him wearing clothes that are at least a size too small. Well, for her at least. Drakken seems perfectly content eating in peace, not even looking up from his plate as he practically devours his second helping.

"Okay, this is stupid," Shego suddenly bursts out.

Drakken looks at her in a confused manner, a little tomato sauce dripping from the corner of his mouth. "You don't like it? Well it's what I had to work with. This isn't a gourmet restaurant!"

"No I mean this! Us, not talking." she tells him, moving her hand back and forth between them. "C'mon, Doc. Ya usually have tons to say, even if you're just belching out hot air."

Drakken doesn't know whether to scowl or shrug at what his assistant just said so he does neither. "I've got nothing to talk about, Shego. Nothing to rant about. No plans to gloat about. I'm just tired. Sleepy."

The villainess frowns for a second before realizing her boss had given her the perfect conversational topic. "Sleepy huh?"

"Yes."

"So… who gets the bed?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter IV**

"Let me see if I have Ron's longwinded and often distracted account correct," Dr. Director says as everyone glares at the blond haired teen.

"The devil is in the details, people," Ron defends himself, crossing his arms. "I was just being thorough."

"Uh huh," Rufus nods in agreement. "Thorough."

"Moving on," Dr. Director jumps in. "Drakken accidentally discovered that combining a particle canon, the Pan Dimensional Vortex Inducer, and a cable box, it could open a dimensional portal that sucks people into their televisions. Kim and Ron, you say that Drakken also invented a device called a dimensional compiler that can do the same thing." She points to the battered and non-working machine sitting on the table. "He used this to escape from the monkeys…"

"_Evil _monkeys!" Ron interjects.

"Yes, evil monkeys," she humors him. "Continuing, He and Shego ultimately ended up in your dimension," she points to Nathan. "and you ended up here. You claim that in your world _we're_ the TV show. So from your point of view, you also were sucked into your television like the others." Nathan nods. "Normally, I would assume your sanity is on a coffee break."

"I wish I were on a coffee break," Nathan whispers to Ron, causing him to chuckle.

"But since Kim and Ron verify you coming out of a portal and you have demonstrated knowledge of our world that someone from a different dimension wouldn't have, I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt. Now, I've got a few theories starting to form in my head, but I'll leave that for the scientists. That being said, Nathan, we'd like for you to stay here at Global Justice while we investigate and sort this whole thing out."

"And if I'd rather not?" Nathan inquires.

"Technically, you haven't done anything illegal, so we can't force you to stay, but I'd highly recommend it," Dr. Director answers him. "Having you on hand to help us out when we need you would really speed things up. Don't you want to go home as soon as possible?"

"Back to my barely above minimum wage job and small apartment that's sparsely furnished? Not anytime soon. I'm treating this like one long overdue vacation."

"We'd be happy to provide with entertainment if you'd like."

"Oh yeah, Like what?"

"Well, do you like video games?"

"I do, but I can play those back home," Nathan replies apathetically. "I'd like to do stuff I can't do in my world, such as chill with these guys." He points at Kim and Ron with his thumbs.

"If you don't stay with us, where would you stay?"

"He could stay with us," Ron interrupts. Everyone gives him a quizzical look.

"Are you serious, Ron?" Kim asks.

"Why not? It'd be like having a brother, right Rufus?"

Rufus runs up Nathan's arm and stands on his shoulder and puts his paw on the redhead's cheek. Leaning against him, the naked mole rat nods. "Uh huh, big brother."

"Don't you think you should ask your parents first?" Kim asks him.

"Point taken, KP," Ron answers and then frowns. "Aw man, I just remembered my dad has an actuary conference this weekend so my parents won't be back until tomorrow afternoon. I'm sure they won't mind."

"Just the same, I think he should stay at my place again for tonight."

"Right again, Kim. Plus it gives me some time to get his room ready. Hope he doesn't mind an attic room."

"My room is in the attic. It's actually kind of a nice place to have as a room. It's somewhat secluded by not really, you know what I mean?"

"I do, and it makes it easier to avoid the twins."

"I need all the help I can get to avoid the tweebs," Kim groans. "Don't you think you're getting ahead of yourself, though, Ron?"

"Uh, no?" Ron replies, not sure what she's getting at. "I mean yes? Maybe?"

"Hey guys," Nathan interrupts. "I'm still in the room. Don't I get a say in this?" The two teens keep talking to each other as if they don't hear him.

"Guess not," Dr. Director answers him and Nathan shrugs, apparently used to others ignoring him.

"Then it's settled," Kim says. "Nathan, you can stay at my house. Ron, you'll call your dad when we get back and get his okay."

"I guess that's okay with Nathan, though we should have asked him," Nathan tells Kim and Ron.

"Why are you talking about yourself in the third person?" Kim asks.

"Talking about me as if I'm not here seemed like the cool think to do and I would hate to be un-cool," Nathan answers her with a smirk.

"What about school?" the director breaks in.

"What about it?" Ron replies.

"Well, what is he going to do while you two are in class?"

"I hadn't thought about that," Ron muses.

"I believe this is the part where your friend comes up with some goofy idea," Nathan whispers to Kim.

"You got that right," Kim confirms.

"I got it!" Ron exclaims, punching a finger into the air.

"Here we go," Kim sighs as she and Nathan roll their eyes.

"Why not have him come to school with us?" Ron suggests.

"I have questioned your sanity many times, and this is one of them," Nathan states dryly. "I already graduated from high school."

"Yeah, but you still look young enough to pass as a student. You'll get to hang with me and KP and meet other bon-diggity peeps like Monique and Tara!"

"And Bonnie?"

"I wouldn't call her bon-diggity, but yeah. You'll probably meet Bonnie."

"There's the deal breaker," Nathan frowns. "I'd rather have my forehead meet with a brick wall than meet her. People like her are the reason I was glad to graduate a year early."

"We have a hockey team," Ron says persuasively.

"Now, you're just playing dirty pool."

"I hear we're short on defensemen now that Stu Gainey transferred to another school."

"Fine, you win," Nathan says exasperatedly. "I'll go to school with you guys."

"Booyah!" Ron exclaims excitedly.

"What… What just happened here?" the director asks Kim.

Kim shakes her head. "I'm as clueless as you are. You know how boys can be."

Nathan sighs. "Ron and I were chitchatting on the way over here, and I foolishly mentioned to him that I regretted not being able to play a fourth year of ice hockey for my school. I didn't know he'd use it against me."

"I suppose it would help us get in touch with you when we need you," Dr. Director states, warming up to the idea. "We could draw up some paperwork to make it look like you're a regular transfer student."

"As long as I get to be a senior."

"You can be a senior."

"Wonderful," Nathan says halfheartedly. "May I have a smoke break now?"

"A what break?"

"He wants to go outside for some fresh air," Kim translates.

"Oh, in that case, let's all take a break and meet back here in ten minutes."

"Please and thank you," Nathan imitates Kim and heads quickly for the door.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter V**

Seven a.m. finds Nathan sitting in the Possible kitchen drinking coffee from the largest mug he could find and poring over yesterday's newspaper. Two more strips and he'll have the sports and comics finished. He doesn't look up when he hears the front door open and someone walking down the hall to the kitchen.

"Nate-dawg," asks a surprised Ron, "what are you doing up so early?"

"My name is Nathan, and I am doing the same thing I do every morning," Nathan responds. "Drinking a cup of coffee while I read the sports and then the comics for a laugh. Usually I have a couple of smokes, but since this isn't my house…" he shrugs. "I'll just have one outside when I'm done."

"Maybe I'll join ya."

"Or maybe you won't."

"Why not?"

"Look, Ronald, I'm a very sharing guy. I don't mind sharing my last dollar or the last piece of pie, but I wouldn't even share my last cigarette with my girlfriend, let alone _you, _a non-smoker."

"You have a girlfriend?"

"Hypothetical," Nathan says with a roll of his eyes. "Would you mind handing me the classifieds, please?"

"Why would you want to buy someone else's junk?" Ron asks, sliding the section across the table.

"Haven't you ever heard the expression, 'One man's trash is another man's treasure'?"

"Nope, sure haven't."

"Okay then."

Rufus hops out of Ron's pocket and scampers across the table. He climbs up on Nathan's shoulder and gives him a smile, a wave and a hello before he starts to browse the want ads with him. "Morning, Rufus. So Ronald, what are you doing here so early and before everyone else is awake?"

"Oh, it's a Sunday tradition between me and the Possible clan," is the answer. "Ever since Kim found out about my bon-diggity cooking skills I've been coming over every week to make the most delish breakfast in all of Middleton."

"What about your own family?"

"What about them?" Ron asks with a confused look.

"Why aren't you at home making _them _breakfast?"

"Oh, I do that on Saturday," Ron replies. "Yup, the Possibles on Sunday and my own fam on Saturday."

"I see," Nathan says getting up, causing Rufus to jump onto the table. He walks over to the coffee pot to pour himself another cup.

Ron notices the pot is over half empty. "Have you… Have you been drinking that entire thing by yourself?"

"Sure have," Nathan replies, sitting back down and picking the paper up again. Once more, Rufus hops back on his shoulder. "After this pack, I can't have nicotine in this world, so I've upped my caffeine intake as a replacement."

"Why?" Ron asks, as he starts to get set up, grabbing various pieces of cookware out of the cabinets and setting them on the counter.

"If I don't smoke, I will be even more cranky than I already am." He looks up at Ron and says through gritted teeth, "And we wouldn't want that, would we?"

"Hehe, no. I guess we wouldn't," Ron responds with a nervous laugh as he sets out the eggs. "Better drink up that coffee then."

For the next several minutes the only sounds heard are Ron cooking a huge breakfast. It will be a big meal since he is cooking for eight people. Well, seven people and one naked mole rat with a ferocious appetite, so it might as well be eight people. "I think I'm in love," Nathan finally breaks the silence and takes a sip.

Ron drops an egg on the floor. "With Kim?"

Nathan spews coffee across the table. "What?! No, not with Kimberly. Relax, goofball," he replies with a smile as he cleans up the mess.

"But the only other female you've met is…" Ron's eyes go wide. "You're not digging on KP's mom, are you?"

Nathan shakes his head as he sets the empty mug down. "Yeah, no. Not even a little, Ronald."

"Oh right. You did meet Dr. Director yesterday…"

"Before you get too lost in thought," Nathan lays the paper down on the table, and pointing at one of the ads, "come read this."

Ron finishes wiping the egg off the floor and walks over to where Nathan is sitting and starts to read the print above his finger. "For sale, older model flat bed pick up truck with 4 on the floor. Rusted body, engine needs work. Great fixer upper. $400 obo. 555-5309." Ron looks at him quizzically. "Wait, is this guy selling a truck or a wind instrument?"

Nathan sighs loudly. "That's oboe with an 'e' at the end. O.B.O means 'or best offer' so theoretically, I could get it for less."

"So you're planning on getting this truck?" Ron asks as he resumes cooking.

"Why not?" Nathan returns Ron's question with one of his own.

"I just didn't think you'd planned on being here for very long is all."

"I don't," Nathan replies pouring another cup and polishing off the pot. He begins to brew another one for the others when they wake up. "I'm still not even firmly convinced this isn't a dream, but I might as well do something fun before I wake up and I enjoy working cars. I used to hang out in the garage with my father when I was growing up helping him fix or rebuild vehicles." Taking a big drink, he stares out of the window and says with a hint of sadness.

"You must be close to your father, huh?"

"I _was, _but I don't want to talk about him anymore." He goes over and sits back down. "I'll call the guy up in a little bit and negotiate."

"Negotiate what?" asks a groggy Kim Possible as she walks into the kitchen.

"Nothing," Nathan answers, quickly closing the paper. "I'm going to go for a walk," he says, picking up his coffee and heading out the door. Just before he leaves, he stops and turns around. "Oh, good morning, Kimberly."

"Good morning," she replies as he disappears down the hallway. Turning to Ron she asks while yawning, "What's wrong with him?"

"He says nothing, so it must be nothing," Ron says, shrugging his shoulders. He doesn't feel like it's his place to say anything since Nathan didn't.

Kim pours herself some orange juice and leans against the counter near her best friend. "So, Ron, what do you think about our boy?"

"Who, Nate?"

"Yeah. Doesn't his attitude remind you of someone?"

Ron pauses and looks around. "No, should it?"

"Let's see, Ron," Kim says as she starts to count on her fingers. "He's rude, he's sarcastic, he gets annoyed easily and he seems more concerned with himself and not so much other people and their feelings."

Ron thinks for a minute then shakes his head. "Sorry, KP, just not making a connection."

Kim slaps her forehead. "Ron, he's like a male version of Bonnie."

"If you say so, KP. I just don't see it."

"Okay, Ron, then how do you see him?"

"I think he's an all right guy. He's got some anger issues, but I think he should be a little upset. Poor guy got ripped from his home and all. I'd be cranky, too. He thinks he's stuck in some fantasy cartoon world. How crazy is that?"

Kim sighs a little. "Yeah, I suppose you're right. It is a weird sitch to be caught in."

"Just give him a chance, KP," Ron says, smiling. "I'm sure you'll get along with him better than you do with Bonnie."

"Can't get along any worse," Kim responds with a tired smile before finishing off her orange juice.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter VI**

Kim and Ron are standing side by side in front of her locker with Nathan opposite of them. Shutting the door with her right hand, Kim says to Nathan, "I guess Ron and I will see you at lunch. Try to be nice."

"I'm always nice," he replies.

"Uh huh," Kim responds, not believing him. "Sure you are."

"I'm nice to almost everyone," Nathan states defensively. "I'm only mean to people who deserve it. You know, people like…" He stops just short of saying Bonnie's name as he sees her and Tara coming up behind Kim and Ron.

"Like who?" asks a confused Ron.

"I think he means…" Kim starts before Nathan interrupts her by waving to someone behind them. Kim and Ron turn to see who it is.

"I see you've inducted another member into the loser club, K."

"I thought you'd be happy, B, since you're the club president."

"Ooh, nice retort, KP!" Ron says, cheering his best friend on.

Bonnie shoots Ron an icy glare. "Quiet, loser!"

"Chill out, Bonnie," Kim says.

"I've got this one, Kim," Nathan informs her as he steps in between the two girls. "I know how to deal with people like her."

"The bottom of the food chain knows how to deal with the top?" Bonnie asks incredulously. "As if," she says derisively as she flips her hair.

Nathan grins mischievously at her. "We have ways of surprising the top."

Bonnie narrows her eyes in suspicion. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

As a response, Nathan grabs her by the waist, dips her over backwards and kisses Bonnie square on the lips. Every jaw in the hall hits the floor as people look on in complete shock. "Rockwaller! Thompson! My office! Now!" Mr. Barkin yells, causing students to scurry to class like roaches when a light is turned on.

Bonnie glares at Nathan, firing daggers with her eyes before stomping off. "Mr. Baaaarkiiiiiiiin," she whines in his ear. Nathan looks towards the two teen heroes and shrugs and then follows behind Barkin and Bonnie, but at a distance.

Mr. Barkin shuts the door, and walks back behind his desk, "Listen up you two, we have serious "No PDA" rules here in this school which you both just broke big time." He glares at the both of them. "I don't even like to see hand holding, understood?" Bonnie and Nathan, who had moved the two chairs as far apart as they could before sitting down, just nodded their heads. Mr. Barkin stands behind his desk, folding his hands behind his back. "Son, I don't know what kind of poorly run school you come from, but here at Middleton High, we play ice hockey, not tonsil hockey."

"I wanted to speak to you about that, Mr. Barkin," Nathan chimes in.

Barkin raises an eyebrow. "Are you interrupting me, Rookie?"

"No, sir."

"Good answer." The school principal turns towards Bonnie. "Miss Rockwaller, I appreciate your enthusiasm for welcoming new students, but next time try shaking their hand first."

"I didn't kiss him!" Bonnie exclaims. "_He _kissed _me_!"

"You didn't put up much of a fight," Nathan antagonizes.

_"_All right!" Barkin shouts before Bonnie can get a word in. "I run a tight ship around and there will be no PDAs on my watch or else I will come down on you harder than an artillery shell." He narrows his eyes at the two students. "Are we clear?"

"Yes, Mr. Barkin," they both answer.

"Good." Barkin picks up a piece of paper off his desk and hands it to the redhead. "This is your class schedule. You only have five minutes to maneuver between classes, so I suggest you be quick on your feet."

"Wonderful," Nathan sighs, standing up. "First period Chemistry."

"Wait, I have first period Chemistry," Bonnie says, heading for the door.

"Then you can show him where it is," Mr. Barkin tells her.  
"I don't want to!" she exclaims.

"I'm with her on this one," Nathan agrees.

"That's an order!" Mr. Barkin glares at them. "Out of my office before you both get detention for being tardy."

Nathan opens the door, letting Bonnie out first. "Ugh, I can't believe I have to walk with such a loser to class," the brunette says disgustedly a few hallways later.

"Really, Bonnie?" he asks dryly. "Isn't it bad enough we have to enjoy each other's company without actually having to converse, too?"

"Whatever," Bonnie responds, flipping her hair. "Just don't sit anywhere near me." She turns the knob on the door, opening it.

"I'd rather sit next to Duff Killigan after a haggis binge," he retorts following her inside. Both of their jaws drop when they see the only two available seats.

"So you ended up sitting next to Miss Thang?" Monique asks with a chuckle at the lunch table.

"Apparently the teacher had problems last quarter getting students to pay attention in class, so she rearranged the seating by alphabetical order to reduce the amount of chatter," Nathan explains. "Really, how can there not be a Smith somewhere in the class to act as a buffer?"

"Looks like you might need a buffer between you and Brick," Kim remarks looking over Nathan's shoulder, causing him to turn around and see the quarterback approaching. "He doesn't seem to be very happy."

"I don't blame him," Nathan says. "If I were him, I'd pop me right in the jaw."

Brick stops right next to Nathan's chair, and looks at the new kid. "You that new kid that was moving in on my girlfriend this morning?" the football star asks.

"I was not moving in on your girlfriend this morning," Nathan answers him, taking a drink.

"So you didn't kiss her?"

"Oh, I did."

"But, you just…" Brick pauses and thinks for a moment. "I'm confused."

Standing up, Nathan puts his hand on Brick's shoulder and starts to walk towards an empty table. "Brick, baby, walk with me. Talk with me." Confusion settles over Brick even more and he follows the new kid. They sit down on opposite sides of the table. "Look, Brick, I'm not interested in dating Bonnie in the least, so don't worry about that," Nathan explains. "But I've got be honest; I'm a little curious why _you're _dating her."

"She's the most popular girl in school, man," Brick replies. "Bonnie says that's the way the food chain works."

Nathan shakes his head slightly. "Fine, the food chain. We'll go with that. Brick, you _are_ the food chain."

"What do you mean?"

"Who do you think is at the top of the food chain?"

Brick thinks for a moment before answering, "Bonnie?"

"Only because you let her be," Nathan mumbles.

"Huh?" Brick replies not hearing him.

"Nothing, Brick. Look, the food chain is stupid. People should be able to do what they want without having to worry about what others think. However, that isn't the case and the only ones who have that privilege are those at the top, you know, rich kids, preppy kids, _athletes_." Brick's traditional confused look seems to grow even more befuddled. "People who are, oh I don't know, the quarterback of the football team."

"You mean me?"

"Yes, Brick, you," Nathan nods and thinks, _His last name should be Wall_. "You are the very top of the food chain. _You _get to call the shots. _You_ get to make the rules. _You_ get to pick who you want to date whether it's Bonnie Rockwaller or Justine Flanner. If anyone doesn't like it, then that's just too bad." Nathan pumps his fist and says excitedly, "_You _are the king, baby, the _king._"

Brick starts to get caught up Nathan's enthusiasm. "Yeah, that's right. I can date whoever I want!"

"Whomever."

"Right, whomever!" Brick exclaims, pounding his left fist on the table before confusion spreads across his face again. Looking at Nathan, he asks, "Wait, so are you saying I should dump Bonnie and date Justine?"

"Ah, no," Nathan says pointing his finger at Brick. "If you decide to grow a spine and break up with Bonnie for someone who will actually treat you with respect, that's your own call. But if you are going to _be_ the man, then you are going to have to _act_ like the man, and that means making your own choices and standing by them. You _are_ the man, are you not?"

"I _am _the man!" Brick roars, standing up.

"You do what you want!"

"I do what I want!"

"You date who you want!"

"I date who I want!"

"And you don't care _what _the food chain says!"

"And I don't care _what_ the food chain says!"

"That's the spirit, Brick!" Nathan proclaims while slapping Brick on the back. "Now you go do whatever it is that Brick Flagg feels like doing!"

"I think I will," Brick says and struts out of the cafeteria, his chest puffed out. Kim, Ron, and Monique are now standing next to Nathan with dumbstruck looks, watching the football star leave.

"Dude," Ron asks, "what did you say to Brick?"

"Whatever I had to to keep him from smashing my face off of the table."


	7. Chapter 7

Drakken wakes up yawning. He sits up, throws his covers off and puts his feet down on the floor. The two normally colored feet automatically start searching for shelter. His slippers. The mad scientist groans as he opens his eyes, remembering that he's not home in his own bed. The bedroom window is letting in way too much sunlight for his taste. Drakken's never really been too fond of the sun. He likes artificial light better. There's no real reason why, he just does. Stretching and scratching his back he yawns a second time before standing up entirely. He has a lot to do if he and Shego are ever going to get back home. Speaking of her, he wants to see how she's doing. After a long argument filled with bickering from both sides it was decided that she'd take the couch, at least for the first night. The reasons provided were that unlike the bed the couch was centrally located, making it a shorter distance to anywhere else in the apartment, and that she needed to keep her leg high, on the armrest that is, to prevent any more swelling. Quietly leaving the bedroom Drakken tiptoes over to the couch where he finds his assistant still in a deep slumber. He contemplates waking her up but decides that after what happened yesterday she deserves her rest, for now. Once again the madman heads into the kitchen. It's time to make breakfast.

Shego mumbles as she slowly awakens. Her eyes flutter as the smell of hot coffee, scrambled eggs and toast fill her nostrils. Rubbing sleep out of her eyes she tries standing up, only to be reminded of her injury. Hissing in pain she carefully lifts herself up into a sitting position and places her feet on the coffee table in front of her.

Drakken slowly appears in the kitchen doorway, holding a tray in his hands. "You're up."

"Wanna medal for noticin'?"

Her boss sends her an annoyed look before setting the tray down in front of her. "Here."

The villainess wasn't sure what to say. No one outside her family had really ever made her breakfast before. Heck, she's not much of a cook herself. She survives on microwave dinners and takeout, and the occasional dinner at fancy restaurants. It's basically been years since the last time she had two homemade meals in just as many days. She silently picks up a piece of buttered toast and starts chewing on it.

"My ankle's feeling a little better. Still aching though."

"And the cuts?"

Shego shrugs. "They sting."

"You're right about your ankle," Drakken tells her as he kneels down and inspects it more closely. "The swelling's gone down."

"So… What are our plans today?"

"We're almost out of food and I need new clothes."

Shego tries getting up, but Drakken places a hand on her shoulder holding her down. "Your job today is to rest that leg. Let it heal."

His assistant frowns as she goes back to her plate of food. Sitting still all day isn't exactly what she has in mind. Even when sick she moves around, if only just a little, unless there's a high fever involved.

"So what're you gonna do?" she asks. "Knock over this place's version of a Smarty Mart? Something tells me things work a little different around here." The villainess motions at her wounded leg.

"Which is why I'm going to _buy_ what I need." Drakken informs her. "I just need to find a way to get the money."

Shego smirks. "Sell off one of your kidneys?"

Drakken lights up like a 100 watt bulb. "Shego! That's brilliant!"

She goes silent. Then she blinks. Once. Twice. Three times. His words replay over and over again inside her head. She has to ask. She's not sure she wants to know the answer but she just _has_ to ask. "What?"

"What 'what'?"

"What's brilliant?"

"That's how I'll get the money we need! I'll sell the boy's things!" Drakken lifts his arms in the air triumphantly.

"Hate to tell ya, Doc," Shego tells him. "But look around. This kid isn't exactly a Martin Smarty."

"So?"

"So I doubt this ratty couch I'm sitting on is worth much. I doubt anything in the apartment's worth more than fifty bucks."

Her boss grins at her. "Probably not, but I have an idea."

"Oh boy…"

"Phase one, we catch up on this dimension's celebrities."

"Ooooh boy."

"Phase two, I use artistic liberty as a salesman."

"Ooh... Wait, are you saying what I think you're saying?"

"Shego, would you buy a chair previously owned by… uhm…" Drakken glances over at Nathan's CD collection. "… Johnny Cash? Who… Eric Clapton?"

"And you think someone will actually fall for that?"

"As long as a celebrity's name is attached to something people will want it."

"Hmmm, people _are_ stupid I guess."

"And who knows, Shego. They might be even stupider here!"

"I have to admit," Shego tells her boss. "This plan isn't completely half baked."

Drakken arches the brow over one eye, giving her his 'oh really' look.

"It relies on the biggest idiot around stumbling in on our garage sale," she continues, "but you've come up with worse."

"Shego…"

"A lot worse."

"Shego."

"I mean, I don't know where to start on the one where you…"

"SHEGO!"

* * *

Author's note: Happy Birthday to SweetnSour.


End file.
